Living with someone who drinks an excessive amount of alcohol is very hard and can feel like a rollercoaster most of the time. Those around heavy drinkers usually find it very difficult to understand that most of the time alcoholics can't really help themselves, but the impact this has on those around them means that alcoholism can be considered a family disease since it affects an entire household.
The principle problem with alcoholism at home is often the sheer unpredictability of the drinker, who can never be relied on to behave normally or appropriately and may cause arguments or even violence. Alcoholic parents cause untold chaos in the lives of their children as well as their own, and are often the cause of arguments and abuse, whether this is mental and emotional or physical.
Many children will blame themselves when their parents are alcoholics, thinking it is in some way their fault. This sometimes results in overcompensation, trying to help or begging the drinker to stop. Having alcoholic parents destroys childhoods and produces many problems in later life, as would be expected when somebody grows up feeling constantly unhappy or afraid around a parent who was a crazed drunk rather than a calm and loving presence.
The partners of alcoholics also find life very difficult. Drunken husbands or wives are notoriously unreliable and often go missing or turn up late, drunk and aggressively defensive, with social occasions being a particular problem when the sober partner has to constantly apologise or make excuses for the alcoholic. Arguments are very common, and domestic violence is also often present in relationships where one or both members have drinking problems.
Because alcohol reduces self-control and removes normal behavioural inhibitions, this leads to shocking acts and often elevated levels of aggression. Home life is normally chaotic and everyday activities like eating dinner, cleaning the house or even paying bills are constantly disrupted, which often results in the partner of an alcoholic having to support the drinker in every conceivable way both financially and emotionally. The partners of some alcoholics have likened the situation to looking after an unruly child who just doesn't care about the consequences of their actions.
Lies, deception and then remorse are also everyday visitors in an alcoholic house as the drinker lies about how much they have drunk, what they have or have not done, where they have been, when they are giving up and plenty else besides. Everyone then has to deal with the spiral of remorse when the drinker wakes up after their last bender begging for forgiveness and full of promises to quit...until they start drinking again and everything slides inevitably back into chaos.
